Secretary
by imnotjkr
Summary: Draco Malfoy's secretary explains the full story to Harry's friends. Because, after all, it's not every day your best friend elopes with your worst enemy!. DMHP HPDM slash harrydraco dracoharry


**Secretary**

You're asking me if I _knew_? Of course I knew, how could I not? I was his secretary; I had to put all his calls through. And I'd hardly not notice that more than half his calls were from a bloke he supposedly hated and that I was always told to tell his wife he was in a meeting if she called. Because those are the signs of a happy marriage.

On my first day, I got the first call and it was a male voice. I remember it like it was yesterday. The moment I picked up the phone and answered he said "Oh, you must be the new secretary Draco was talking about. Tell him Harry's on the line to talk about Christmas."

I thought that was a rather bizarre thing to say because it was the middle of May but I got up and went to his office and told him Harry was on the line and wanted to talk about Christmas. He went bright red. Now Mr Malfoy has very pale skin, so when he blushes, you really notice. And when he said "Please put him through," his voice was all croaky. It was very unusual.

They were on the line for over an hour and when the boss got back from lunch, I was sure that the shirt he was wearing was different to the one he'd worn that morning. And it was definitely too big for him. His tie was rather loose but he looked like the cat that'd got the cream.

It would happen every now and again, and Harry always had something knew to talk about, Easter, Ron's birthday, Potions class, whipped cream, the supply cupboard, but at the time I wasn't that suspicious. Now I look back and think that I should have realised sooner.

My first suspicions were aroused the first time Mrs Malfoy called. She asked if she could talk to her husband, so I went up and told him that she was on the line. He sighed, picked up the phone and said, in such an exasperated tone, "What do you want Pansy? …No, you don't need new shoes…I don't care if they're a bargain…How much are they then? …You call THAT a bargain! …Look, I'll see you tonight, alright…Good, see you."

As soon as he'd hung up the phone, he turned to me and asked if I could kindly tell his wife he was in a meeting if she ever called again. And it seemed so unlike him, because normally he was so social and cooperative with people on the phone. Like Harry … Like _Harry!_

And that was when I realised it. I listened in on a few of their phone conversations after that. Trust me; they are definitely … well … _passionate_ together.

The first time I met Harry was my boss's birthday. He came into the room looking for all purposes like he owned the place and smiled at me. He had long black hair in a pony-tail, really piercing green eyes, a huge leather jacket and a mischievous grin. I remember thinking that if I hadn't been in a happy relationship at the time, I would have been flirting like there was no tomorrow!

So he turned to me and the moment I heard his voice, I knew it was Harry. "Do you mind telling the boss that I got a birthday present for him to _unwrap_."

My face went so red it felt like it was on fire, but it was nothing compared to Mr Malfoy's when I told him. He managed to croak out "Send him up" before I left, but it was obvious that he wanted me to, even without the words. It was only when he left two hours later and minus a leather jacket that I realised it was _Harry Potter._

It was like and epiphany, and suddenly it all made sense. Why they had to hide it and everything. I mean, I'd already guessed that the marriage was arranged and not something Mr Malfoy was happy about, but I'd never understood why they didn't tell everyone they were having an affair. I know that'll sound silly to muggleborns, but in the Wizarding World, everyone knows who's the mistress of who and who is having an affair with another man.

No one thinks any less of someone because they are having an affair or their partner is, well, particularly if you're a member of one of the _old_ families. Like Mister Malfoy. But because it was with Harry, then of course they wouldn't want it to go public.

Can you imagine the publicity! Neither of them would be able to leave their homes, let alone get together anymore, and I was sympathetic. I'd become rather fond of the two of them really. I suppose it was my maternal instinct asserting itself, I've never had any children. And I'd always felt sorry for Harry Potter.

I'd trained with his mother when I wanted to be an auror. I failed the entrance exam, but Lily, who was three years younger than me, passed. I didn't feel bitter about it though, Lily was incredible at it and I had had my misgivings about it since I'd signed up too. However, she never returned after she went on maternity leave.

I met James and his friend Sirius when she passed the exam. We all went out to celebrate. James was obviously very much in love with her, and she with him. Sirius was a brilliant kisser, very over confident and afraid of commitment. It wasn't until I first went out with Harry that I found out I'd had a one-night-stand with Sirius BLACK!

It was about two months later that Harry came to the office again. He and Mister Malfoy were 'busy' in his office for about an hour and Harry came down just as I was leaving at the end of the day. He offered to take me out for a drink. We'd been talking a bit on the phone before I put him through to Mister Malfoy since his birthday, and we'd sort of become friends. I, of course, accepted.

Well, we both loosened up after a few drinks. And we started talking about jobs. Anyway, I said that I'd started training as an auror at one point with his mother. He asked if I'd ever met his dad and I explained about the party and happened to mention that I'd gone home with his friend Sirius. Now, he said "Well, Sirius Black always was a ladies man."

I think I spilled my drink on him. He was a real sweetheart about it, and, according to my now husband, he even made sure I got back safe. The rest of the night is a bit hazy for me, however nowhere near as hazy as my hen night!

Alright, alright, I'll get back to the point. So, Harry and me made friends and it was great. Several people got photographs of me and him together and thought we were a couple. I may look younger than I am, but I'm older than his mother! Honestly, idiots at the press. I told my husband obviously. He was quite happy with our friendship, and not at all jealous. After all, Harry's gay.

Did I mention that I'm now married to Remus Lupin? I didn't even know he knew Harry till the night he took me home. How weird is that? We'd been dating for about two months. He'd been renting my spare room for about three months before that though. But I doubt you're here to hear about my social life are you?

You're here because you want to know what really happened. I mean, your best friend elopes with your worst enemy; of course you want to know what happened from the beginning.

When Pansy ran off with that muggleborn gardener, that's when the relationship became more … intimate, I suppose. The divorce came through, and I think that's when they began to consider formally getting together. Telling everyone.

But then that idiot of a journalist turned up asking for interviews on Mr Malfoy's opinions on what Ms Parkinson was saying. Turned out she'd sold them to the newspaper's so she could afford a fancy wedding for her and her new _sweetheart_. Bitch.

Suddenly, they couldn't go anywhere. So, Harry came to see me and Remus. It was my idea to elope, actually. I'm rather proud of that.

You know the rest of course. How the papers got pictures of their wedding, I'll never know. And now they're on their honeymoon. I bet you anything their enjoying it. So, when Harry and Mister Malfoy get back, do you want me to tell them you called round? What were you're names again? I know you told me before, when I let you up, but I really have the most terrible memory for names. Mr Ron and Mrs Hermione Weasley and Mr Neville and Mrs Ginny Longbottom. Of course I'll tell them. Hope to see you again.

Oh, and Mrs Longbottom. Those shoes are absolutely gorgeous. Where _did_ you get them?

* * *

A/N: What do you think? I was originally going to make it DracoHermione, but then I realised that I hadn't ever written a DracoHarry, and that's actually one of my favourite pairings. So here it is. Please review. 


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